According to Matt Miller at the Washington Post, “As many as 100 million Americans live in households today that are earning less than their parents did at a similar age. And this is happening well before we feel the full impact of global economic integration with rising economies like India and China.”
Matt Miller might be right to suggest we worry about this. Perhaps there are global economic and political implications my simple mind doesn’t understand. And perhaps if we aren’t making as much money as our parents did, then we’ve made a wrong turn someplace and should figure out what to do to correct it stat.
Or he could be wrong. It could be that we should stop pursuing more stuff. We don’t actually need as much money as our parents had. Maybe we should worry less about how much our homes resemble the Pottery Barn catalog and immediately cease measuring our worthiness by our annual household income. Perhaps the person who dies with the most stuff is not necessarily the winner after all.
But I’m all for improvement as a society and as a nation and world, and I welcome the opportunity to do better. I think growth and evolution is what this life is about. So I’m proposing that instead of beating our parents out financially, we try to beat them out emotionally. If we could reduce shame, fear and anger and increase compassion, peace and love, wouldn’t that be a win? And furthermore, if our children’s generation is mentally, emotionally and spiritually stronger than us could we want for anything better?
And that is why I do this work. The things we want in this life we only want because of how we think they will make us feel. Truly. Whether it’s a bigger bank account, a smaller pant size, a healthier relationship or for something good to happen to your child, it all comes from wanting the feelings you believe you will feel when you get it.
And I don’t believe it’s wrong to want things. I keep several pinterest boards full of “wants” and add to them semi-daily. That’s twice a day folks. Just when I’ve decided I don’t even like TOMS they come out with a new wedge that I’m sure will make me happy and besides… “one for one” so getting myself these new shoes is like service right? Man, it’s going to be a good day for me and the world when I get THESE.
But in the end I know that I can feel what I’m longing to feel any time and in fact the shot of excitement over the new shoes will wear off faster than I wish it would. All of the emotions I want to feel are available to me at any time if I pay attention to my mind and practice the skill of intentional thinking. That might sound like new-age mumbo-jumbo right now but if you choose to join me in a workshop or a coaching program and keep reading these blog posts, it will change your world entirely.
My desire is to empower and strengthen women because I believe what Glennon Doyle Melton, author of Momastery and Carry On Warrior said, which is, “If your goal is world improving, the safest, most effective entry point is WOMEN.” That’s one of a million brilliant things she says and if you aren’t reading her blog and book you must do so right away. It’s better than getting new wedges.
This is where you think I’m going to say that women who raise kids are especially influential but that’s not actually why I focus on moms. I think many women in many different roles influence the next generation and the current generation significantly for many reasons. Regardless of whether they are raising kids in their homes or not, the nature of women makes our contributions impactful. I focus on moms because being a mom is so stinkin’ hard.
I worked for many years in a corporate setting as a trainer and leadership coach and much of what I learned there explains why being a mom can take a serious toll on your emotional health. If you want to help people succeed at a job, leadership theories say you should have clear expectations, regular feedback, motivating rewards and recognition, regular breaks and vacation days, an appropriate work environment, training and development opportunities and work/life balance. If being a Mom is the job, well…I’ll let you connect the dots on your own.
If you are a mom, you know a mom, or you have a mom then you get what I’m talking about. And I hope you, your friend or your mom will keep reading, come join me in a workshop or work with me one on one and let’s do some world improving.
Have a fantastic weekend!
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